i got some coffee this morning at the internet cafe on 5th Ave. i noticed that they sell 5th Avenue candy bars there as a sort of homage. when i voiced my approval the guy behind the counter smiled and said, "yeah, classy, right?" that gave me pause because frankly, and in all seriousness, that's my word. well, i got to credit Manny too. he helped.

It started about the time we went down to New Orleans last May. Manny and i were just hitting our stride to where everything that met with our approval was "classy" and not only that, but something that really impressed us and demanded a more effusive declaration would illicit the words "classy, distinguished and refined," voiced in a high- volume growl that was aided by a steady stream of Crown Royal and Coke. and the world has been getting classier ever since.

slang is a code. one appealing thing about using particular words and phrases like classy is that you exert ownership over language while communicating something more than the words themselves to those who share in the patois. so when i say classy, it satisfies me and signals to my compatriot, "hey, we know what it's all about."

and so, for the first time, i present to you, faithful reader, the Dutch Classy List:

Classy

fireplaces
Abe Lincoln
East Coast Sour Diesel
eating outmeal for breakfast
Roger Federer
Spoon live at Warsaw in November
free pool
"dope"
Gibbs
jive honkies
5th Avenue bars (especially when sold on 5th Avenue)
sticky fingers
cabooses
the law, and our rigid adherence to it
boogers
Peruvian Inca-style caps
hanging johnny
Cowboy Junkies
nice boots
a roof over your head
to do lists

Not Classy

Jack Abramoff
gruesome discoveries
spilling